My Musings

It’s All Relative

Happy New Year! I’ve been gone for a bit because I’ve been building out my new website. I hope you like it. This will be easier for me to keep up because I won’t have to rearrange the entire page every time I add something.

So, what’d you get for Christmas this year? I’ll be 55 in two weeks, guess what I got? A brother! Isn’t life a trip? Congratulations! It’s a boy! I got a Facebook Instant Message that said, “I know this may come as a shock, but I believe you’re my half-sister.” Say what? I sent back to him and asked some questions. After several messages back and forth, We found out he was born between my two sisters. Our father had me then my brother then my sister with my mother, they got divorced, he had my new brother, re-married and had my half-sister. Surprise!

He called me yesterday, as soon as I answered the phone I KNEW it was true. He sounds exactly like my father to the point it was a bit unnerving. He was raised as an only child and now has an instant family. I’m thrilled to welcome him as a sibling.

He said he’d been searching for decades for our father. He took the Ancestry DNA test, which I’d taken years ago since I do genealogy. Usually when we get the results from the DNA test, it tells where in the world our ancestors come from and the tons of cousins that are 4th and greater removed by the tons. When his test returned it said we shared the same father. Yeah, that’s close! As we talked we discovered many commonalities. Even though we were raised entirely separate, we learned we did things that aren’t shared by DNA, such as coin collecting.

I hated being the barer of the bad news that our father passed away in the summer. Had he learned all of this a year ago, I would have happily connected the two of them. Knowing my father, he would have loved getting to know his son.

Although he and I are excited to have found each other, as we talked I found myself sad by how life decision are sometimes made out of necessity instead of heart. My father married my mother out of necessity and the “right thing to do.” However, it turns out his parents had been in love for many years. I believe in the grander plan and all things work out as they are meant to. In our position we just find ourselves in our limited human form with the age old wonder of “Why?” One day we’ll learn how everything happened as it should and why. For today, we just need to appreciate the gifts of life we’re given. I thank God for the gift of another brother. I’m sorry for so many lost years with him, but will embrace the years going forward and look forward to making memories. Have a blessed and happy 2017!

Written by: Laura Ranger

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